First thing's first, I want to welcome Ella Maxwell to the world!! She is beautiful and I am so sad I missed her first couple of days - I can't wait to meet her!  Baby and Mom are both healthy and happy!

Now here are some pictures!

Asha - a ZANGOC employee and just wonderful all around

Shaib at the YCI office, just chilling

Some participants at Women's Leadership Training

WLT

Raifa facilitating WLT

WLT

Stone Town is full of huge, gorgeous doors.  Just be careful, the spikes on them actually hurt (just ask my rump)

Stone Town

Stone Town

Ben and I were in a shop and the little boy put his shoes on! Mtoto nzuri sana!

House of Wonders - previously a palace of a Sultan of Zanzibar (Sultan Bargash, I think)

Stone Town - on the right is part of the Old Fort

Kahawa - nothing better! (coffee)

So excited about coffee. Always. 

Picking out food at Forodhani Gardens Night Market - I had some baracuda, Mahi Mahi, and Zanzibar Pizza (mango and chocolate - yuuuum!)

One week left in Zanzibar - Home in 9 days! Canada in 10!

Lots to do before then! 

Monday

Salaam Alaikum!  (Peace be upon you - a common greeting in Zanzibar)

With Monday morning brings the end of WLT!! It was successful - our tactic was to invite two women from each NGO with 10/11 NGOs per day.  This way we invited 20 per day, with the hopes of 12 showing up every day.  Thursday we had 12, Friday we had 18, Saturday we had 20, and Sunday we had 10.  However, not as many confirmed as those that showed up, and so the numbers (especially Friday and Saturday) were more then we expected - fantastic!

Needs Assessment is still progressing, with the goal of having all of the NGOs completed by Saturday June 2nd.  Around half are done, which is pretty good progress for all of the logistics of finding time when the NGO members are available, as well as the people assigned to visit them.  Hurrah! It is all getting done.

Now I have to write 3 reports.  Yippie!  And I arrive home in 13 days - which means I board the plane in 12 days (24 hours of travel, more Yippie!).

Before I give a more detailed update about the projects and results of my programs (in another post), I wanted to shed a little light on education, from a book that I borrowed from Ben: The Betrayal of Africa - Gerald Caplan.

"As anyone who's visited an African school can attest, just attending school is hardly the same as getting an education.  With few exceptions, and especially in rural and city slum schools, students are likely to endure wildly overcrowded classrooms, few learning resources, lack of clean water and proper sanitation, no separate toilets for girls, no capacity to feed hungry children, not enough teachers, teachers who are untrained, unmotivated, badly paid, often absent, and teachers who use harsh, authoritarian methods of discipline to hammer home their teacher through memory work alone".

Here are more of the facts: A lot of schools do not have clean water for the students, but comes out of a spout in the middle of the "school-yard", many of the toilets do not have doors or appropriate waste systems so the waste ends up on the ground around the toilets.  Some classrooms are packed with 100 students (- 100 students! I don't think I could even fit 100 students into my elementary school classroom in Ontario.)

In 2005 barely 60% of children in sub-Saharan Africa went to primary school. This is the lowest enrolment anywhere in the world - more than 40 MILLION African children received no schooling - that is almost half of the school-aged child population.  

Don't forget the gender inequalities - 2/3 of those who do not receive an education are girls.  In terms of secondary school, only 27% of boys and 21% of girls attend. If you want to talk university, only 6% of males and 4% of females attend - for a comparison, 2/3 of students in rich countries go to post-secondary institutions. 

This is just the tip of the iceberg - and obviously different countries have different statistics, because even though a lot of people like to think Africa is one big mash of a place, it is actually 54 separate nations. 

However, in my own experiences (this year and last year in Morogoro) I witnessed these practices in the school system of Tanzania.  Overcrowded classrooms; teachers not trained; teachers who do not care; harsh discipline - often involving being beaten with a stick; children being let off of school early, not coming to school; teachers not showing up for school; a tap in the middle of the school buildings that serves as drinking water and a place to wash your hands; bathroom stalls (a building on its own, not in the school) missing doors so people watch while you use the washroom; inadequate bathroom sewage so waste is no drained properly, or at all, spewing out of the stalls. 

This is 'the Africa' most people think about from the Western world. This isn't true for every place, and in fact some of the schools I visited had adequate toilet facilities, and regular hours, for example.  But the statistics point to the same phenomenon of inadequate education systems in many parts of sub-Saharan Africa - in large part due to SAPs (structural adjustment programs) by the IMF and World Bank. There are a lot of factors at play, and I by no measure know the solution to the problem.  What I do know, however, is the appreciation for education and knowledge from people who are not given it: when you have to fight to attend school, you do not take it for granted.  

Education. School. Grades1-12. Post-secondary education. The availability of OSAP and bank loans. These are things which, in Canada, are either mandatory (school) or easily attainable (loans to attend school).  There are misfortunate and poor people in Canada, I know this.  And attaining education is not easy for them, and I am not reducing their hardships or their experience or their lust for knowledge and education.  But nothing compares to the appreciation of education and knowledge from those who do not have easy access to it.  

So for today, when you read this, think of your education.  Think of the days you whined and cried to your parents because you didn't want to go to school, because your teacher was mean, because you didn't care; or when you were just too lazy to get up for that 8:30am lecture.  Then think of all the other places in the world where children do not get an education because they cannot afford the annual $12 USD school fee (ex: Kenya at one point in time); where there is no school in their rural village; or where children go to school during the day when they can, and work all night selling plastic bags at the market or nuts in the traffic-jammed street of the big city.  

Think of all the people in the world where education is a dream, not a reality.  

Remember how fortunate you are.  Then get dressed and go to school. 

WLT

First day down! Three to go!

Other than a bit of a slow start at the beginning because the attendees were late (alas, Swahili time), day one of women's leadership training went pretty smoothly.  At first the GET team wanted to hire a facilitator for this training ---> expensive and unnecessary.  I convinced them that by working together the GET members could facilitate the training.  This way, they get a little more education on leadership training for women, as well as facilitation skills for the future.  Raya - a GET member, SMOOCH member, teacher, and mother of three - was the facilitator for the morning session.  She is fantastic! I think she could do all four days and it would be wonderful.

One of the things I've been pushing for is having the women on the GET team facilitate the training for WOMEN's leadership training.  It's a hard battle to win.  They agree, say "yes, yes", but then assign one male and one female to facilitate together.  Alas, I lost the battle.

In today's session Raya and Juma were facilitating.  However, Juma had to go to work in the morning and so Raya had the floor to herself.  This reduced the possibility of her voice being subdued by Juma, who facilitated in the afternoon.  What I am most worried about is the men cutting the women off and dominating the facilitation of the training.  Even though these men are part of the GET (remember, gender equality team), and are progressive thinkers in terms of gender in their culture, it is still a large concern for me for the rest of the training - but we'll have to see how that goes.  My fingers are crossed.

We then had lunch and moved into the afternoon session.  While the morning was more content, the afternoon was filled with group work/activities.  Juma did a good job with the activities, which were designed to facilitate self-confidence and empower the women to see how they can make a difference.  Using the tools and language that was discussed in the morning session.

Both facilitators did a wonderful job - Raya is a teacher and is a natural in front of a crowd, and Juma was nervous but did a good job.  The 4 sessions of leadership training are the same everyday - they feature around 20 different women each day.  So four different groups get the same training.  This way we can concentrate more on the content and have better facilitation with smaller groups (& save money on venue costs).

There's a quick little recap of what's going on with me and women's leadership training, and another early start to the day tomorrow!
Siku njema! (have a great day).
love love love,
Jamie

Weekend Trip

Hujambo!

I hope everyone had a fantastic long weekend at home!  I, on the other hand, had my first 'adventure' of my trip - a little overdue, I think.
Ben and I started off by going to Jozani Forest.  That was an adventure in and of itself.  We chose to take the cheapest means of travel - daladala.  However, when the dala's go out to the villages they are not usually the small van/bus type that you find more in the city, but these trucks.  So it's a truck with a long back on it, covered. So you climb in and have to duck, and there are benches around the perimeter of the truck.  However, people travelling have things to take back and forth, and when your only means to get around is the daladala you have to have somewhere to put it all.  Alas, the roof of the covered truckbed is also a "shelf" - people put bicycles up there, stacks of wood, harvested seaweed - Ben and I saw a dala drive by with a fridge on the top! (amongst other things).  It's ridiculous how many people they pack into this form of transport.
So, this is what we used to get to Jozani - and the ride was a little longer then we anticipated, but we arrived safely.
We got to Jozani, paid our fee, met our guide Mwiny, grabbed some bikes and took off.  Bikes!  It was great to ride around a bit on the bikes, relaxing and definitely cooler.
So there are three parts to Jozani - the mangrove boardwalk trail that is the only one of it's kind in Zanzibar, the smaller forest section where the black monkies and Red Colobus Monkeys (and Blue) are, and the HUGE forest in the opposite direction that you feel so inconsequential because of the beauty and enormity of it all.
We did all three.
It was low tide when we were there so there was hardly any water to walk through on the boardwalk, however there was a lot of mud underneath us and crabs everywhere! They were so cute, scooting along sideways.  But when it's high tide the water rises about 2m and even covers some of the forest we walked into after.  The Mangrove trees are beautiful - the vines all twisting and coming out almost like a Menorah at times.
After that we biked back to almost where we started and just walked into the forest. There wasn't really a path that we were following, then BAM!
monkeys.
They were right above us.  Some snoozing, some grooming, a couple just looking at us.  Adorable.  Their tails are so long - longer then the length of my leg.  I know I was mesmerized - I wasn't expecting to be so close to them, and it didn't bother them one bit.  We moved on to another path and the monkeys we encountered here were even closer - so close that I could have touched them.  We kept inching closer to get some good pictures, and almost to see if we could touch them, and they just kept eating, or hanging out - we did not phase them in the least.  They are SO beautiful! After we hung out with the monkeys for awhile, we headed back to the main lodge/restaurant to go to the big forest.
You can walk for hours in it, but we chose a shorter path to follow just for a little taste.  Mwiny told us that at night it isn't safe in the big forest because VooDoos come in and collect plants for their magic, and they are unsafe to be around at night.  Good thing it was about 2pm!
The forest was so quiet and so beautiful - so immense.  I could have hung out there the whole day.  You could have filmed Indiana Jones in there.  There were all kinds of trees, and some eucalyptus trees as well, which as smooth and beautiful.  If you stood still and stared at the forest roof you could see the tops of the trees swaying with the rhythm of the wind.  Breathtaking.
After we grabbed some grub and started the 1km hike to the Zanzibar Butterfly Center.  It doesn't sound so exciting, I know.  BUT the ZBC is a community project.  Because people who live in the more rural villages do not have means to an affordable income, they resort to activities that will make them some money, but degrade the forest - like making charcoal, which kills trees essential to the diversity and survival of the forest.  So, this ZBC started.  What they did was teach those in the community who were willing, how to collect and harvest caterpillars into cocoons.  The ZBC then buys the cocoons off of the butterfly farmers, providing them with a steady and decent income.  The ZBC sells the cocoons to butterfly sanctuaries all over the world, and it is non-for profit, where the income from visitors at the sanctuary is the money used to pay the farmers in the village.
Not all of the cocoons are sold though, they are placed in the sanctuary where the butterflies eventually emerge.  It is a big enclosure in the forest surrounded by a net - protecting the butterflies from harm and allowing them to live.  It is beautiful.  So peaceful.  I just sat on the bench for awhile and watched the butterflies fly around me.  A little slice of heaven really.
They have about 20 different kinds of butterflies, and Alfred (the expert who was working there Saturday) can identify them from their cocoons.  So many colours and shapes.  I got some great shots! (despite not having my fancy camera, pole sana).
After the ZBC we sat by the road and waiting for the daladala to come back - there are many running at the same time, but because we were far from town the last one goes about around 5.  It was just before 4 when we went to wait for the dala, and we finally got on one around 4:30.  And packed-in we were.  Like squished s'mores.
We got back to StoneTown, grabbed our overnight bags, dinner at the Green Garden (yuuummm! I had a whole avocado to myself and it was heaven), and then called by taxi friend Modi to take us to Jambiani.
We stayed at the Kimte Beach Resort and it was wonderful.  It is run by a bunch of Rastas who are the chillest, nicest people every - plus we were the only two at the hotel since it is low season right now.  We only arrived after dark so we couldn't see the beach - we went to walk down and discovered it was low tide.  (I didn't realize until morning how low low-tide is!!) But the stars were out and they were so bright I could have slept on the beach..... bus alas, I don't get along well with the mosquitos!
Sunday morning was a relaxing one, to say the least.  We had breakfast at the restaurant (part of Kimte) on the beach, tried to walk out to the water but it was too far (that's how LOW), so walked to a dhow that was chillen on the sand.
There were a lot of people sprinkled over the beach - some even as far out as the ocean.  They are seaweed harvesters.  They get up about 1 or 2am and harvest seaweed until about noon when the tide comes in.  And boy did it come in fast! Unfortunately, we were leaving as the tide came in, so no swimming happened.  However, on our walk to the dhow I did get my feet wet with the Indian Ocean and it was fabulous!! Haha.
Our ride back on the daladala was just as adventurous as it was the day before, and it took a long time because we were a lot farther then Jozani.  And so, I was late for my first meeting, almost ever.  As in 45 minutes late.  I've learned from last year being in Morogoro and this year being in Zanzibar that when you say the meeting is at 3, people come for 3:30 or 4.  However, I am still on time, it's something that I just can't stand - when I'm late.
I ran to the office and (a little surprisingly) most people were there.  The meeting went well.  Women's Leadership Training starts on Thursday and so now we are kind of rushing to make sure the attendees are attending.  Which is started to stress me out a little bit.  Plus some of the people I work with are trying to marry me off (I'm pretty sure it's all in good fun, so I just laugh, but I keep telling them the door is shut and locked and they can't marry me off, just in case).
Monday brought with it lots of preparations and content finalizing, NGO contacts, and confirmations.
Today is more of the same thing and WLT is going to be upon me before I know it - literally!! Yikes!


It was a great weekend!  Apart from the little things to do in StoneTown, I plan on going to the Mbweni Ruins, Mtoni Ruins, Safari Blue, and Prison Island.  Lots to do in the next 2 and a half weeks - plus three reports!! Yaaaaay!
I hope everyone at home has a happy return to work today after a great long weekend!

Sending lots of upendo <3

Jamie

mangrove boardwalk

mangrove trees

bikeride

monkey!

again!

HUGE forest. Gorgeous.

Butterflies coming out of their cocoons

eating some fruit

low tide.

low tide and seaweed harvesters

feet in the ocean!

ps, if you click on the pictures they'll get bigger :)

Week 3!!

Waddup. Monday brings me preparing for the Women's Leadership Training, for a meeting tomorrow, and getting ready for a day trip this weekend.  

This past weekend we started the Needs Assessment for Gender Policies in the NGOs ZANGOC is associated with, as well as introducing them to the GET. Just judging from the ones that I went to, it went well - I'm hoping the other groups had just as much success.  Because one NGO we visited was only available in the morning, and the other was only available at 4pm I had quite the adventurous day.  I was partnered with Juma, he is a GET member and works with ZASO (an NGO for HIV/AIDS orphans and vulnerable children), and I had the pleasure of meeting his family.  I met his two younger sisters, their children, as well as his mother.  People are very excited to welcome you into their homes and introduce you to their friends and relatives, sometimes it can be overwhelming.  They were all very sweet and welcoming and happy to meet me, and the children were not scared of me like Katie is at home.  

Other then planning for WL training, as well as a meeting this week, Ben and I are going to Jozani Forest.  It is home to the rare Red Colobus Monkey, which is not so rare to see on a day trip.  I think we will also visit the Zanzibar Butterfly Centre and potentially Zala Park.  It will be a day full of animals!!! I'm excited.  

Thursday night Cheryl came to town to visit Ben and I (buuuut mostly me, because we hadn't seen each other since I arrived in country).  We went out for dinner - we started at the Africa House Hotel for some coffee, and it was beautiful.  It is a second story balcony that overlooks the ocean - the stars were out and so bright!! I was mesmerized, as I always am with the sky.  We were joined by Ben's friend Eric who is a psychologist working in Dodoma.  After, we moved over to an Ethiopian restaurant.  It was my first time eating Ethiopian and it was DELICIOUS.  You order different dishes and it is served on a circular platter on top of this spongey bread.  You eat the food with little rolls of this bread, and when you finish, you eat the plate!! Yummy yummy in my tummy.

So, that is the big stuff that has happened since my last post.  Other then that I had a dance party with Aisha, Neema, Ishaka, and three of the neighbouring children in our house last night, and I got henna-ed again, but this time it was piko and not on my nails.  

Sending lots and lots of upendo,

Jamie

ps- i LOVE reading all the comments!! Thanks for leaving them :)

On to week 2 ! (Wiki mbili?)

Nothing much to tell right now! 

The meeting with the GET team went well on Saturday - we planned out who would go to which NGOs for the needs assessment on which days, in which pairs, for the next 3 and a half weekends.  We were going to try and get it all done this week, but because the people who work in the NGOs that have partnered with ZANGOC (an umbrella organization), also have full-time jobs in addition to working for their NGO, so they are not reachable during most days.  

That leaves nights and weekends.

Nights are not ideal, so we went with weekends.  Two groups of two people will go out each Saturday and Sunday this month and visit two NGOs each - we will also use Saturday, June 2.  Meanwhile, I will gather up results and write a preliminary document.  Hopefully we will have time to conduct a validation and findings meeting with these NGOs, but I will be crunched for time that last week, so I may not be able to get it done.  If that is the case, the next Innovator, Ben, or the next Ambassadors to come in (that's what I was last year), can read my report and hold a dissemination meeting.  It's more of a curtesy to present what we found then anything else - but because the needs assessment questionnaire is pretty easy for me to translate and then collect the results as we go, the report can be written in the meantime, with the last session just being an add-in or confirmation.  

Because we have had to spread out the needs assessment, this means we can move up the women's leadership training.  I have to meet with some of the GET members, hopefully this week, to confirm this and get the ball rolling, but it makes more sense to do this.  Leave this week for planning (which I've started to do), and next week, and then start holding sessions the week after.

This weekend was a breather more then anything.  The three days of travel, and then right into work and meeting people had finally caught up with me and I was tired - I slept in both days, which is something I do not usually do - and just hung out.  Other then the meeting on Saturday, I did not do much of anything.  I was colouring with Ishaka, Neema, and Aisha for a bit on Sunday, and Mama painted my fingernails in henna, along with a little design on my hand.  She owns a Salooni (salon - hair, nails, etc) just three spots down from our house.  Painting finger and toe nails in henna is something that most women do here instead of nailpolish. They also paint the henna around your finger nails, so from after it looks like your nails are longer I guess, but it sort of looks silly on the white girl that I am.  But I like the henna on my actual fingernails.  I guess the last Innovator in Zanzibar (March, I think), stayed in my homestay as well and Mama painted piko (black henna, it's substance is a little different) on her hands, arms, and feet.  It didn't go so well.  It started to swell and get itchy - she had to go to the hospital and get injections for the reaction - she vowed to have no henna after that!  Poor girl!  But so far, so good for me (plus I've had henna and piko before, phew).

This week is mostly planning and getting some stuff ready for the first needs assessment this weekend.  The GET members doing the needs assessment have a meeting on Thursday at 4, and Cheryl (country project manager for YCI) is coming to Zanzibar Thursday to meet with me, and Ben, see how things are going.  Last year she arrived and starting working just before my group arrived - I haven't seen her yet since she was on holidays when I arrived last week.  

Other then that, I'm just at the YCI office in the mornings, and hanging around ZANGOC in the afternoon.  And hydrating adequately!! 

View from a restaurant/cafe Ben and I went to for some wireless internet Friday

Morning jolt of AfriCafe!

Lots of love from Tan.zan.ee.ah!

J

Hey All !

Today is really hot. It's been raining off and on since I got here, so it's been cooler with a nice breeze every day, which isn't to say that it's cold, it's still hot.  But today, oh geez, today it is hot!  But I'm not complaining, it's gorgeous!

I haven't really taken many pictures yet, but here are some for you to enjoy :)

Samaki I had for lunch yesterday, nom nom nom

Cow in the middle of everything. They're everywhere!

Taking a break this morning - so hot !!

The ocean from Stone Town, it's so nice out today!

View out the window from the YCI office

Week 1

Mambo vipi!

I hope everyone in Canada is well, warm, and happy.  It is warm here (for me), but it is raining an awful lot.  I've managed to only get stuck in it once though - hurray! ...so far.

So Sunday night I left, and I arrived Monday night around 9.  Got through the airport, with my Visa and CTA, checked into my hotel, slept, met Domitila (YCI logistics manager) in the morning, got on the ferry and arrived in Zanzibar to Shaibu and Ben!

Shaibu is the YCI Zanzibar manager, he oversees all of the volunteers, innovators, and interns.  Ben is the YCI intern right now, working with ZANGOC on health policy - he graduated last year from U of T with a Kinesiology degree, so our backgrounds are very similar.

Tuesday was a holiday, so that's when the GET team (Gender Equity Team, under ZANGOC - who I am working with directly) was able to meet.  Because members of the GET team all have permanent jobs, meetings do not happen regularly or with everyone in attendance.  So, we stopped by the ZANGOC office to meet everyone, then went over to my new home for 6 weeks.

Last year my homestay experience was amazing. I could not have asked for better hosts, so it is the least to say I was a little nervous - I'm also by myself this year, missing Jen-my-better-volunteer-half - so it'll be a new experience.  However, they are lovely!  I am living with Mama Miriam and her five children - Isaac (the youngest, who will be 3 on the 17th), Aisha(6), Namea(8), Sabrina, and Lucy.  In addition, there is the housegirl and a little mtoto named Kat (I'm not sure who she belongs to or where she's from, she appeared yesterday and has stayed so far! haha).  Rashed is the father of the household, but he is not always present because he has a second wife and family who live in another house. I met him last night and he is also very nice.

So, I guess you want to know what it is, exactly, that I'll be doing?  Well, right now (apart from writing this blog post, it's 11:35am here), I am writing a road map for the next 6 weeks - what exactly I'll be doing, how it is going to happen, time frames, etc, etc, etc.

GET and Shaibu identified 3(put into 2) main tasks that they want me to focus on while I'm here.  The first is introducing the GET team to 45 local NGOs.  ZANGOC is an umbrella organization that has partnerships with 45 NGOs in Zanzibar and Pemba (a little island near Zanzibar).  Because the GET team was established in August 2011 by Lisa d'Alimonte (intern with ZANGOC & YCI last year, I met her while I was in Morogoro last year as well), not all of the NGOs know about GET or what it's all about.  However, getting around to 45 NGOs spread across the island isn't the easiest, or cheapest, task.  So, we paired the first task up with the next two.  So, for the next 2.5 weeks my main priority is conducting a needs assessment in 25 of the NGOs in relation to gender policy.  Then, with some GET members, we will write a report, confer with the participants, and confirm our results.  This will then help the next Innovator and Shaib assess the current Gender Policy in ZANGOC and GET and develop a revised one.

While this is being done, we need to start working on the next project.  Women Leadership Training.  There are elections coming up in the NGOs ZANGOC works with.  GET wants to encourage female members to run for election positions.  To do this, they want to encourage them and provide them with tools to do this, to increase their leadership and self-efficacy.  (I think) we have decided to invite 2 females from each NGO, breaking them up into 4 Groups.  At the most, we will have about 90 participants, however not everyone is going to accept - that's just the reality.  However, this way we will reach a larger percentage of the women.  The training will be two days for each group, lasting 8 days in total.  However, because of budgeting reasons (I get to work with a budget! Yippie!...it's also in a different currency then I'm used to, with different prices for things, so I'm asking Shaib a lot of questions, hahahaha), and jobs, etc, we have put the training for just mornings.  So, each group will consist of about 20 women who will come together for two mornings.

This is an extremely rough sketch of what will be going on - especially with the Leadership Training since there is still a lot to discuss, so it may change.  The only thing I'm worried about is the lack of availability of the GET members - we need to get rolling so I can complete these tasks before I leave... 6 weeks is not as long as you think it is - no matter what Brent or my parents tell you! *(bahahahha).

So. That is what it, kinda, looks like for now.  How much travelling I'll do, I'm not sure.  Although after I met my homestay family on the first day, Ben took me into StoneTown and we wandered around a bit, got a little lost.  I plan on going to the beach atleast once - if by myself that's fine too.  I'll go see all the historical stuff in Stone Town as well, however a lot of the tourist stuff is closed for the month of May because it is low season! Huh!
And I REALLY REALLY want to see Franki, Magunda, and my family from last year again - hopefully they'll be in Dar and I can see them before I leave on my plane! (My homestay family from Morogoro last year relocated to Dar es Salaam - so hopefully I can convince Magunda and Frank to come visit me!)

Anyways, ta-ta for now.  Or, Kwahiri !
(Swahili is coming back to me slowly - pole, pole).

J